Silent Night
"Look out for the ghost," they'd said when they sold her the house, "she might give you a bit of a scare but she doesn't mean it." The ghost was a little old lady called Mrs Price. She had lived there as a widow and had died alone in her armchair in the Winter of 87. By the time she was found she'd been dead for over a week. Mrs Price wasn't angry, they'd explained, just lonely. Besides, she only really turned up at Christmas. She liked the atmosphere, apparently. Sometimes she'd sing carols, or play with the decorations. She'd been seen once or twice. And she loved The Snowman. She always turned up when The Snowman was on, one way or another...
Five O'clock
Astrid looked carefully around the room one last time as the credits rolled
and saw absolutely nothing out of place. She slumped back down on the sofa
and clicked the TV off. The crackle of static on the screen died away and
then the room was filled with the silence and darkness of the sudden night.
Astrid didn't know whether she was disappointed or relieved or both. Her
right hand found her left hand's third finger to fiddle with her wedding
band, the way she always did when she was nervous. But of course it wasn't
there. She drummed her fingers on her knees instead and said "Hmm".
"
Nothing happened," said a voice next to her.
"
I know," replied Astrid, "I don't understand it. She's always supposed
to turn up when The Snowman's on."
"
Honestly," sighed Kate, "here I am on Christmas Eve, not getting
drunk with my husband but sitting in a darkened room because my little sister's
scared of ghosts."
Astrid looked pointedly at the camera and Dictaphone in Kate's lap.
"
You came here because you thought it would be cool to see a ghost," she
sighed.
Kate put the lens cap back on the camera, slowly and pointedly.
"
I came here," she replied at last, "because you asked me to."
There was a creak at the far end of the room. The sisters gasped and Kate
leapt to her feet. Astrid froze and listened hard, but heard nothing except
her sister struggling blindly with her lens cap. There was a click, and the
room was momentarily brightened by the camera's flash. Then everything fell
back into a darkness illuminated only by the little red capillaries of her
eyelids, slowly fading with every blink.
"
Did you see anything?" whispered Kate.
"
No" Astrid replied.
"
Maybe something'll come out on the film."
"
Maybe we should switch the fairy lights on." Astrid was suddenly aware
that she was whispering too. "She likes the fairy lights."
Half Past Ten
Kate watched the Christmas tree and TV throw shifting lights and colours
onto Astrid's face.
"So she's definitely meant to come tonight?"
Astrid turned away from the television. "Every Christmas night without
fail."
"
I wonder why Christmas. I mean, aren't ghosts supposed to come on Halloween?"
"
Maybe she likes the company."
"
What," grinned Kate, "a couple of overgrown kids who sit up waiting
for ghosts and watching cartoons?"
"
Well, she died alone, didn't she, and Christmas is a time where you see your
friends and family, you know, the people you love, and maybe she likes to
feel... the warmth..." Astrid's voice petered out. She looked back down
at her bare hands.
"
Astrid... baby..." Kate reached out to smooth her sister's hair. Astrid
knocked it away.
"
Besides," she choked, "Beauty and the Beast is not a cartoon, it's
an Animated Classic."
"
Cartoon," replied Kate, sternly. Astrid smiled up at her and caught
an escaping tear with her thumb.
They sat for a while, scouring the flickering shadows for any irregularity.
"Do you remember," said Astrid at last, "when we used to
stay up all night and wait for Santa?"
Kate giggled. "Yeah. But Mum and Dad wouldn't let us go downstairs until
seven. So we'd just sit up in my bed and talk."
"
We used to play Truth or Dare for ages," muttered Astrid, "or you'd
read to me."
"
Oh God!" Kate smiled distantly, "Alice in Wonderland!"
"
Did we ever manage to stay up all night?"
"
Not once," laughed Kate. "We'd usually fall asleep in the same
bed at about three."
Astrid hugged her knees and smiled. "Didn't those nights seem to go
on forever?"
"
Yeah."
They fell silent again, watching the cartoon.
"Why don't we spend more time together these days, Astrid?"
Astrid paused the video.
"
Because things are different. We're grown ups. We've got different friends,
different lives. You've got Pete and I've got... I've got my own problems."
Kate nodded. "So, is it your friends you're seeing tomorrow, or Jason?"
Astrid looked down at her hands again. "I don't think I want to see
anybody tomorrow."
"
What? You're just going to sit in here on your own and feel sorry for yourself?"
"
I won't be on my own, remember?"
"
Oh great. You're going to have a lovely day moping around with a dead old
woman." Kate put her hands up to the rest of the room in general. "No
offence, Mrs Price."
"
It's just that it's wrong, me having fun without Jason tomorrow. He should
be here with me. With the kids."
Kate stared at her sister. What was that supposed to mean? They didn't have
children. Astrid had become a mystery to her as she'd grown up. Ever since
boys had got involved. And then they had both left home and got married and
been perfectly civil to one another and seen each other a few times a year.
And then, out of the blue, had come the divorce. But nobody ever dared ask
why. Astrid was so withdrawn these days. And besides, it was personal.
Astrid began playing the video again.
"
Astrid."
"
Mmm?"
"
Truth or Dare?"
"
Not playing."
Five seconds to Midnight
"
Four... three... two... one... Happy Christmas!" Astrid turned on her
Mum's old Christmas cassette.
"
Happy Christmas, baby." Kate clinked her lager can against her sister's.
As she drank, Astrid fished a small package from under the tree.
"
Do you want your present now?"
"
Let's wait until seven," said Kate. "They way we always used to."
"
OK" shrugged Astrid, and put the present back.
Suddenly, Kate shot up. "Sssshh!"
Astrid held her breath. There was a distant whirring sound. She could only
just make it out. Slowly, Kate reached over and turned off the stereo. The
whirring stopped. The sisters looked at each other. Kate turned the music
on again. The whirring noise returned. Astrid exhaled.
"
It's on the tape. It must be because it's so old."
Kate relaxed as well.
"
I suppose it must be because it's midnight," she explained. "I
was expecting something to happen. It's traditional, I guess."
Astrid nodded, and then thought for a second before addressing the room in
general.
"
Merry Christmas, Mrs Price." She held her hand up to her sister and
they both watched and listened. Then they looked at each other.
"
Nice try, though," said Kate.
Ten to Two
Astrid was halfway down the stairs with the duvet in her arms when she heard
Kate shout. She broke into a run, tripped over herself on the last step
and landed hard on one foot on the landing. Cursing, she limped at speed
into the kitchen where Kate was standing against the washing machine, waving
her hands vaguely.
"
Over here," whispered Kate, "do you feel it?"
"
The cold spot?" asked Astrid leaning against the counter.
"
Yeah." Kate paused. Her sister hadn't bothered to join her. "How
do you know that?"
"
That window's a bugger. It's always letting in a draught."
"
But how do you know it's a draught?"
"
Because it's worst when it's blowy out, genius. Like tonight."
"
Oh."
Astrid slung the duvet over her shoulder and left the room. Kate picked up
the freshly brewed teas on the counter and followed her.
The two young women snuggled under the duvet and sipped their tea.
"
This is only the twenty seventh Christmas Eve we've spent together," said
Kate eventually. "Funny, that. Seems like more."
"
It's less," replied Astrid, "it's only the twenty fourth."
"
What?"
"
We didn't spend the last three together." Astrid explained. She was
fiddling with her wedding ring finger again.
"
Oh," said Kate, "yes. I forgot."
There was another long pause. The loose window in the kitchen rattled in the howling wind.
"Truth or Dare?" yawned Kate.
Astrid bit her lip. "I had a miscarriage, Kate. Now will you just shut
up?"
Kate stared. Mrs Price could have cartwheeled across the room right then for all she would have cared. Astrid looked down, her knuckles turning white as she squeezed the mug. The wind moaned and slapped branches against the house outside, but inside the silence was thick and black as treacle.
"I had a miscarriage and... we couldn't cope. I know some couples can
get through stuff like that but we..." Astrid gasped, "I've messed
everything up."
Kate blinked. Her sister had started to cry, and hard. She took her hand.
"
Why didn't you tell me?"
"
It was... private." Astrid was struggling for breath. She still hadn't
looked up.
"
But you're my little sister," protested Kate, "we used to take
baths together. I let you wear my first bra. There's no such thing as private."
Astrid finally looked up at her sister. There was a bright anger in her eyes.
Anger and deep, drowning sadness. There was a little lost girl in there.
Kate remembered her well. She wrapped her arms around Astrid and kissed her
hair. There was nothing else but soft, muffled sobs.
After about half and hour, Kate found an old, dog eared copy of Alice Through The Looking Glass and started to read aloud.
Quarter to Eight
Kate slowly surfaced back into wakefulness. Her closed eyelids detected sunlight.
She looked about herself drowsily. It was another grey, windy December
morning. She nudged Astrid gently.
"
Santa's been," she whispered.
Astrid snorted, then opened her eyes to the pile of presents she had left
under the tree the night before.
"
Well I'll be" she smiled. "And no ghosts."
"
Nope," said Kate, picking the open book off the floor. "We must
have nodded off at about three. As usual."
Astrid stood up and stretched. "She's meant to turn up every year."
"
Maybe people only see what they want to see." Kate picked up the empty
teacups. "Er, about last night..."
"
Yeah," said Astrid, "listen, thanks."
"
It's OK." Kate scratched her head. "Um, I'm going to go home, take
a shower, have a nap."
Kate was putting her shoes on when a small, brightly coloured parcel was
thrust under her nose.
"
Don't forget your present."
"
Oh. Of course not. I put yours under your tree."
"
Can we open them now?" asked Astrid. "It is after seven."
Kate looked into her sister's eyes. The tears had died, but the ghost of
a lost little girl still lingered. All alone in Wonderland. It was haunting
in ways Mrs Price couldn't contemplate. A smile started deep inside her and
opened up on her mouth.
"
No," replied Kate. "At my house we wait until dinnertime."
"
But... I don't want to open my presents alone."
"
Astrid, I said you'll have to wait until dinner."
"
Kate?"
Kate winked at her. "Get your presents and let's get out of here. This
place gives me the creeps."
"I don't think Mrs Price will like spending Christmas on her own," Astrid
says to Kate as they leave.
"
Well, she should have turned up last night," replies Kate, "but
we'll drink to her. OK?"
"
Bye Mrs Price!"
"
Happy Christmas!"
The door shuts and the key turns in the lock. The car starts up and drives
away. The dust settles. The loose window in the kitchen rattles. A shadow
behind the tree moves and I slip silently from my hiding place. It's so quiet!
The presents are gone and the fairy lights are switched off and the weather's
miserable but I do still love Christmas so much. I hum a little. There's
usually families and friends here at Christmas time, so much warmth. But
that poor girl had been so cold. She had needed to be alone with her sister
more than I'd needed company. And now there will be family around more often.
Her family. And they'll drink to me today. How nice.
Silent Night, Holy Night...
The shadow passes through the house and slowly fades.
All is calm, all is bright...